The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos.
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Vacation: a period of travel and relaxation when you take twice the clothes and half the money you need.
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A smile is the light in the window of your face that tells people you're home.
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A hypocrite is one who sets good examples only when he has an audience.
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Grandmas never run out of hugs or cookies.
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Silence speaks when words can't.
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The day the power of love overrules the love of power, the world will know peace.
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Hockey players wear numbers because you can't always identify the body with dental records.
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Is "UGH" an emotion? Because I feel it all the time.
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Cinderella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life.
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I like rumors. I find out so much about me that I didn't even know!
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A river cuts through rock, not because of its power, but because of its persistence.
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The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.
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I've never been skydiving, but I have zoomed-in on Google Earth really fast.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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A teenager is someone who is well prepared for a zombie attack but not ready for tomorrow's math test.
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Dear sleep, I know we had problems when I was younger ... but I love you now.
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We lose ourselves in books. We find ourselves there too.
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The man who stops advertising to save money is the man who stops the clock to save time.
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Hockey is figure skating in a war zone.
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