SANTA CLAUS QUOTES II
quotations about Santa Claus
Santa ... is a man with a harsh and stringent code. Santa makes lists of children throughout the world and, oh no, he puts them in categories according to their behavior. His ledger has two columns: one for the good and the other for the bad (the "naughty" and "nice"). He gives toys and candy to the well-behaved children, but he doesn't forget the bad kids, no, he puts lumps of coal in their Christmas stockings. He believes in accountability, but is generous of heart and of a forgiving nature. Last year can be forgotten if you were good this year.... Santa likely wouldn't go in for participation awards and scoreless soccer games for the kids. No, he believes in real outcomes, even in rewards and punishments. So dare we say it: Santa is a conservative.
FRANK MINITER
"Is Santa Claus, dare we say it, a conservative?", FOX News, December 19, 2016
Parents, make sure the kids aren't reading over your shoulder because it looks like we're about to have a blue Christmas: Santa Claus is dead. Archeologists said Wednesday that they might have discovered the ancient tomb belonging to the original Santa Claus, otherwise known as St. Nick, beneath a church in southern Turkey, according to The Washington Post.
HERB SCRIBNER
"Santa Claus is dead, researchers say", Deseret News, October 6, 2017
Santa only comes to those who believe. He doesn't care if you believe in him or not, and he's not trying to make anyone believe who doesn't believe. If you don't believe, he just skips your house.
JENN-ANNE
"Dad told me there is no Santa Claus. Is that true, Mom?", Chicago Now, December 19, 2016
The real Santa Claus is at the mall.
LEMONY SNICKET
The Lump of Coal
Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree for me
Been an awful good girl
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight
EARTHA KITT
"Santa Baby"
Santa Claus had the right idea. Visit people only once a year.
VICTOR BORGE
attributed, Quick Quotations
My heart breaks for the day I had to explain my mistakes
And the mask goes away and Santa Claus is fake
JAY-Z
"4:44"
The myth of Santa has grown to gigantic proportions. He is able to know all, to judge each and every child, to make reindeer fly and do all these things at the North Pole! Obviously Santa has slowly taken the place of God, doing things which only God can do. Unfortunately, this "god" is a legalistic "god," dispensing gifts only upon those who deserve them.
JOHN L. HOH, JR.
Santa Claus: Is He For Your Child?
Under a welfare state there is always the danger that adults as well as children will believe in Santa Claus.
EVAN ESAR
20,000 Quips & Quotes
I think Santa Claus is, by and large, quite beneficial, for when the child is finally allowed -- or forced -- to recognize the nonexistence of Santa Claus, then the child is able to go through the vital intellectual process of reconstructing reality in light of new evidence, complete with back-forming new stories to account for past events. This prepares the child for many other disillusionments and gives her vital and well-supported experience in maintaining her grip on reality independent of the stories told to her at any given time.
ORSON SCOTT CARD
Lost Boys
The whole concept of some stranger making his way down our chimney -- not that we had one -- suggested burglary more readily than generosity. Any Santa who tried it would have gotten a bullet in his holly, jolly keister.
THOMM QUACKENBUSH
Of Christmas Present
Though I adore the idea of Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, Sandman, the Tooth Fairy, and such luminary characters--especially their altruism and devotion--I still don't believe in them. For I know the truth. Only one such miracle worker exists who performs magic in my life, seeing to my wants and needs without fail. That queen is my mother. With unwavering faith I believe in her.
RICHELLE E. GOODRICH
Smile Anyway
But Santa Claus himself would not have approved this speech. He brought toys to the children because they were little and helpless, and because he loved them. He knew that the best of children were sometimes naughty, and that the naughty ones were often good. It is the way with children, the world over, and he would not have changed their natures had he possessed the power to do so.
L. FRANK BAUM
The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus
So Santa Claus is bogus but Grim Reapers are the genuine article. What does that say about the world?
MINDEE ARNETT
The Nightmare Charade
I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus
Underneath the mistletoe last night
She didn't see me creep
Down the stairs to have a peek
She thought that I was tucked up
In my bedroom fast asleep
Then, I saw Mommy tickle Santa Claus
Underneath his beard so snowy white
Oh, what a laugh it would have been
If Daddy had only seen
Mommy kissing Santa Claus last night
TOMMIE CONNOR
"I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"
Ho, ho, ho
Santa's comin' back, around
So get ready
Christmastime is my favorite part of the year
'Cause ah, there's a lot of love in the air
And holiday cheer
TODDIEFUNK
"Santa's comin' baka round"
Get ready for a theory that will blow your mind. Ready? Okay. The whole "Santa coming down the chimney" thing is clearly just a muggle conspiracy to cover up the fact that Santa is a wizard traveling by floo powder.
DESIREE O
"This Harry Potter Theory Claims Santa Claus Is a Wizard", Brit+Co, December 14, 2016
Just one Santa delivery team? How could there be? There are 526,403,012 children, all expecting presents before tomorrow morning. So, that's 22 million children per hour. It's impossible. Obviously, I got a second sled.
STEVEN MOFFAT
"Last Christmas", Doctor Who
God put Santa Claus on earth to remind us that Christmas is 'sposed to be a happy time.
BIL KEANE
Jeffy's Lookin' at Me
Of course Santa is dead, you force a guy to eat a billion cookies in one night, what do you think is going to happen?
JIMMY KIMMEL
Jimmy Kimmel Live, October 5, 2017